


but the rain never came

by jbbames (artifice)



Series: put me in the dirt, let me be with the stars [4]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Classical Music, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Music, Birthday, Drabble, Gen, Light Angst, M/M, Non-Serum Steve Rogers/Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes | Shrinkyclinks, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, if u squint, more so a character study, pianist Bucky, whoops daddy issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-19
Updated: 2019-07-19
Packaged: 2020-07-08 06:08:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 587
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19864771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artifice/pseuds/jbbames
Summary: “You don’t care,” Bucky says, all quiet, because knowing something and saying it out loud are two different things. The admission hurts more than he thought it would.





	but the rain never came

**Author's Note:**

> i have a midterm tomorrow whoops !
> 
> [edit 07/21/2019]: [series playlist here!](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6dD3nFHjQtq0HVoRPxbYFs?si=U-IHMVdEQcKP1q5e6kCWoQ)

**_The shade always comes at the worst time._ **

* * *

_July 3, 1998_

“No, sir,” Bucky has to bite his tongue to keep from saying anything too brash.

“James, I could hear the piano from outside,” Pa pinches the bridge of his nose. “I know you were playing ‘Happy Birthday’.”

“Sir—”

“James.” Pa’s voice is sharp. “Steve’s birthday is tomorrow. You could have spent your time tonight practicing your Schumann.”

With a frustrated sigh, Bucky’s temper reaches a breaking point. “My Schumann is fine, ‘cause I practiced it before you came, and you’d know how my music is doing if you _came home earlier_ , but—”

“Don’t take that tone with me, young man—”

“But, like you just said, _Steve’s birthday is tomorrow_ , and I need to play this perfectly now—”

“Steve won’t care if you make mistake, and God knows none of us do either—”

“But _I_ care, I want things to—" Bucky cuts himself off, suddenly subdued.

Pa raises an eyebrow. “Well?”

Bucky feels very, very tired. It’s nearly midnight, and he had just wanted to make sure he could make Steve’s eighth birthday perfect. Everything was in place; everything except his stupid fingers, who couldn’t coordinate themselves for the life of him. It was just Happy Birthday, but his left hand wasn’t making the jumps accurately enough.

The thing is—

The thing is, he cares so much. About the coming get-together, the surprise party, Steve, the stupid piano. And his Pa, his father?

“You don’t care,” Bucky says, all quiet, because knowing something and saying it out loud are two different things. The admission hurts more than he thought it would.

Pa exhales, then taps the lid of the upright and picks his briefcase up from the floor.

“Of course I care,” he says, like the fight has escaped him. “I pay for all your tuition, don’t I?”

_The thing is_ , Bucky’s not so sure that means much.

“I hate the piano,” he announces.

The man in front of him blinks. “Okay. That’s too bad, because you’re sticking with it.”

Bucky grits his teeth and pushes himself off the bench. He grabs the red keyboard cover folded on the lid with more aggression than strictly necessary and slaps the fallboard closed once the fabric is on straight.

“Yes, sir.”

An awkward silence falls on the two. Not trusting himself to say anything else, Bucky marches out of the room and upstairs as casually as can, and he brushes his teeth with a scowl. Steve’s voice floats in his head, a soft _your face is gonna stick like that if you don’t relax a lil’, Buck_.

The thought eases the hard lines around his mouth, and he settles in bed with Steve The Swan (“So you know I’m here when it doesn’t feel like it, okay?”) under his right arm. Bucky Bear—Steve’s present for tomorrow—sits in a sparkly blue present bag from Dollarama, partially hidden by red and white wrapping paper. While drifting off, he goes over the plan for tomorrow: Steve’ll be in for lunch, then they’ll see the movie, and after heading back to Steve’s for video games, dinner, and cake, they’ll sit on the roof, like they always do, except they’ll…….

-

(Unbeknownst to Bucky, John Barnes puts a hand on the lid of the upright and squeezes his eyes shut to fight against an overwhelming torrent of emotions. He didn’t mean for that to happen. He certainly didn’t want to make his son unhappy, he just—

—it’s been a long day, is all.)

**Author's Note:**

> fuck it i love it hey bucky run up the budget ! *static sounds* u can talk to me on [twitter!](https://twitter.com/artificiaIis)


End file.
